Lifes Little Lessons

New quote to live my life by "Sometimes your Knight in Shining Armour is just a Retard in tin foil!" This can be looked at one of two ways... First, the guy that you believed to be perfect turned out to be something far from that. Two, Even though you know you deserve that knight in shining armour you just setter for the retard because he is there at that moment. Recently I have had an encounter with the first example. Just about a year and a half ago one of my friends had me call one of his friends and we started talking on a regular basis. We started sharing details of our lives that you only tell those who are closest to you, I felt so comfortable talking to him. This guy had become the man of my dreams... LITERALLY!!! He made me feel so special and made me feel wanted. Worst of all he made me happy. I became that stupid love sick girl who could see herself spending the rest of her life with this special someone. For a year and a half it was this guy and only him even though he was hundreds of miles away. I couldn't imagine my life without him. A month ago I went to go see him and it was probably the worst trip of my life. This guy that was supposed to be perfect basically blew me off and I spent 90% of my time sitting around in a hotel only to find out when he was taking me to the airport that him and his ex girlfriend were talking about giving it another shot. I never even got a chance!He was everything I ever hoped for and my worst fear came true and I wasn't good enough. This guy that I trusted with everything and believed in had let me down. I jumped hoping to fly and I fell like a rock! I'm really just sick of being the one that takes the chance and puts myself out there and getting hurt... I can't take much more of this! It has been a month and I still think about him all the time... everything I see and everything I do reminds me of him and it takes all I have not to send him a text when something happens because I just want to share it with him. I don't full on bawl my eyes out as much anymore, but every now and then I am reminded and my eyes fill with tears and at least one rolls down my cheek. I'm trying so hard to stay busy but it isn't exactly working in my favor, but I guess we will see what the next few months bring. Wish me luck!